How to Answer The Door

Here, although you have to read a bit to tget to the funny part.

The Temple got its name from an early commercial that my group, KU SOMA, shot for the college local-access TV station, to advertise our existance. The commercial was called "How to Answer the Door", and was made largely in reaction to a rash of door-to-door religion salespersons who had been causing quite a bit of amusement in our secular (read "lost") liberal town of Lawrence, Kansas.So we took advantage.

Cue the first shot, a standard old house in this town, with a cute front porch and a big white door. A narrator's voice booms, "How to answer the door, presented by KU SOMA."In the first scene, my girlfriend and I dressed up as a classic Southern Baptist televangelist and his dutiful wife. I hairsprayed my curls up into the most appalling bouffant hairdo I could manage, and held up a Bible to the spikey-haired SOMA chick, Becca, as she answered the door.

In my worst southern accent, I screamed at her, "DO YEW HAVE PRUH-TECK-SHUN FROM THE E-TURNAL FAHR!?" (Do you have protection from the eternal fire) In answer, she pulls back, grabs a fire extinguisher from beside the door, and blasts us with it. Let me tell you, THAT was fun to film!! As we throw up our hands amid the blast, the screen freeze-frames, and a red circle-with-slash graphic comes up over the scene, a buzzer sounds, and a voice admonishes, "NO!"

No! Bad Atheist! No Donut!