If I Were God

...
well, just absorb that for a second.

ok.

anyway, if I were, this is the kind of thing I would do more often.

Luciano Mares, 81, of Fort Sumner said he caught the mouse inside his house and wanted to get rid of it.
"I had some leaves burning outside, so I threw it in the fire, and the mouse was on fire and ran back at the house," Mares said from a motel room Saturday.
Village Fire Chief Juan Chavez said the burning mouse ran to just beneath a window, and the flames spread up from there and throughout the house.
No was hurt inside, but the home and everything in it was destroyed.
Unseasonably dry and windy conditions have charred more than 53,000 acres and destroyed 10 homes in southeastern New Mexico in recent weeks.
"I've seen numerous house fires," village Fire Department Capt. Jim Lyssy said, "but nothing as unique as this one."

Double points for the correct grammatical use of unique.

It's worth pointing out that, statistically, you (yes, you!) witness about 3 events of probability 1:1,000,000 a year of 10 seconds or less.