BPD: Yeah, a crime in progress? Take a number...

Jim and I go to the local BPD to report his car stolen. It's 3:50pm. We are the second people there. There is no one at the front desk. A couple of inquiries to passing officers reveal the problem: It's almost 4:00. All the cops are at roll call. Lesson 1: If you are going to commit a crime, do it between 3:50 and 4:20. You'll get a nice head start.

4:20 officer appears at front desk, starts servicing folks at random. There are a dozen people in the queue now, all with some form of stolen car problem.

A middle aged man (not me) walks in and says, "I've just been carjacked! The guy is driving away!"
Officer: "Whoa there. You were what?"
Guy:"Car jacked"
Officer:"Where?"
Guy:"Right on Mass Ave"
O:"Where on Mass Ave?"
G:"1650. He's..."
O:"Oh, okay. That's our jurisdiction"
Mark: WTF? our what???
G:"Here's the license plate #. You can still get him if..."
O:"Sir, we don't stop cars. That's not our job. Unless it's illegally parked, then we could catch him"
G:"WHAT!!!?????!!!!????!!!???"
Mark: "WHAT??"
O:"No. We don't stop cars. So if you'll just get in line, you can get the paperwork and fill it out:
G:"But he's getting away! If you just got on your walkie talkie and ..."
O:"We don't do that sir"
Lesson 2: If you steal a car at gunpoint and the victim is not actually a cop, you have hours to get away. Maybe days.

Lesson 3: We need to start licensing private police forces.